Monday, 22 December 2014

From the Vault

A REAL POST!  It's a Christmas miracle f'sho!

     A little over a month ago, my boyfriend and I celebrated our 4 year anniversary.  He's been in a different city for his university so we've been doing the long distance thang since January of last year.  Needless to say, I think fondly of him all the time and miss him dearly when he is away.

     Our first semester apart was a challenge, but it ultimately was the catalyst for a much needed reinvestment in the relationship.  We faced an obstacle together and both put in the work to make it into a relationship worth investing in (it really wasn't hard because we care deeply for each other on many levels, it just took a plan and open communication).  Anyway, when he first returned home in the late spring, our home town of Vancouver was balmy, humid, and global-warmingly pleasant.
     I was so excited to reunite with my swarthy, bearded cherub!  The day finally came and I made the journey to his house.  I thought it was odd that he didn't offer to pick me up though.  I was too filled with anticipation for real hugs that I wasn't miffed for long.  I burst through the back door and made my way to the basement living room.

     Instead of greeting me with open, tanned arms, he was crouched on the ground.  To my disappointment, his face was sombre, almost nauseated.

 I knew something was terribly wrong.  Was his pet bunny dead?

     The growing tension was intolerable, I had to find out what turmoil awaited us.  I could see the bunny in his usual hangout under the TV, so that knocked out one type of trauma.  I asked what was wrong and he put his finger to his lips and pointed to the work desk.  Drawers were strewn across the floor.  I crouched down and peered into the dark cavern, inside was a pair of glowing green alien eyes!

     This random cat squeezed through an open window or door at some point and made itself a home in the desk.  He has never owned a cat and we are both painfully allergic.  Frightened, dehydrated, and probably hungry, it just stood in the desk and yowled like some sort of hell beast.  I named it Kitty Goo Goo, as an homage to Milhouse (  just in case).
     After strategically opening  windows, attempting to lure Kitty Goo Goo out with a ham and cheese platter, and forcing my boyfriend to don work boots, a ski jacket, work gloves, and a safety broom to herd the cat out the window, we finally set Kitty Goo Goo loose on the world again.  It was like that weird movie everyone references in King of the Hill about a couple rekindling their romance by letting a pig go in their house, except probably with a lot more legitimate screams of fear.  That was one angry cat.

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