My drawing abilities are a little rusty right now, so bear with me, and we'll get through this. Thank glob for 4 day weekends next semester.
A few nights ago, I dreamt that I was hosting a tonne of people at my family cabin. There was a property beside ours for sale so we went over to check it out. Equipped with a full on beach house sleeping cabin and separate boardwalk toilet, I decided to see if it had indoor plumbing. There was a cat inside the little out-housey structure so I gave it a scritch then dropped trow to tinkle. In real life, I would never, ever, ever pet a wild, flea and tick ridden cat then touch my junk area, but it's a dream and anything can happen. And that was certainly the truth. The toilet had one of those chain dangling flusher pulls, so I had to take advantage of that because I've never used one before. To my horror, as I stood up to pull my undies and pants up, I had a spongy set of male genitalia.
Possibly an even more strange turn of events, the cat I had been petting came out of the toilet.
It told me that it was an ancient demon, but I was pretty pissed off that it gave me a D after petting it and saying nice things to it. I didn't even call it a pussy.
Adjusting to my possibly fake, non-function man parts was really challenging. The texture was like stress ball material, and was definitely not human skin, or even part of my body. I tried tucking it between my legs, but that made walking really uncomfortable.
I gave up and put my shorts back on, if anyone notices, maybe the sorcery would go away.
The terror disappeared from my unnatural package and I returned to my friends, a make-shift Scooby Doo Mystery Team, complete with Chris Hemsworth as Fred.
The take-home message from this dream is that I have NEVER, EVER had such a vivid dream about junk before. Hopefully I haven't scared anyone for life. It was just so strange. Here's one more piece of uncomfortable fun to round out the post!